Hate Myself

It's a cloudy day on 30.7.11 at 3:20pm and I am on my rocking chair while penning this. Just finished washing the car porch, patio and mopping the entire house. I am not exhausted physically but in fact I am stressed mentally. I am so affected by my kids. At this point, I feel that my life is just all about them. They make or break my days. I can be extremely upset when my boy does not wash his face and develop pimples. I can be extremely worried when my gal takes her own sweet time to do her loads of homework during the weekend. All their petty affairs disturb me and I will respond by nagging the whole day until I am tired of myself. I begin to hate myself for the nagging, scolding and shouting at them. I am so disappointed with myself. Why cant I have more patience, why cant I just leave them alone, why cant I just get busy with my own business? Hmm:(